...*UPDATED*...
I wake him up at his usual time (6:40). (whereupon he is usually great about popping right out of bed, getting dressed, eating some breakfast, taking the dog out, feeding both dogs, checking their water, brushing his teeth, kissing parents good-bye, then heading out the door by 7:02...whereupon the bus picks up the neighborhood middle schoolers at around 7:20) (Oh...and I need to mention that he usually is in a fine fine mood)
Today was different.
I went back to bed after waking up the lad and woke back up at 7:07, realizing that Tween was still slumbering soundly. Here I go now..with my lovely cowlick head: "Clancey! You're late, bud! It's 7: oh seven!"
What???!!! I'm soo tired! School! Everyday. Everyday!
(intermitent stomping and huffing throughout house)
few minutes later:
K...well...get going. You can still make the bus. (7:14)
(huffing. puffing. negative energy vibes. etc.etc.)
(apparantly he leaves, and friend is waiting outside ready to ride bikes asuming that because Clancey wasn't at the bus stop that they were gonna ride) I hear:
Dude!! I'm not riding!! Gosh!
(back in house huffing and full of emotion)
I hate this!
Clancey...it's OOOKay.
No. No it's not. This is stupid.
(poor little buddy is so frustrated. I think he needed his structure today)
I hear him leave. (which is unusual. He always comes to kiss me and say goodbye)(it's 7:20)
......2 minutes later......
Mom...I came to say good-bye. I love you.
K. Bye. Love you. Hurry.
...5 minutes later...
He's back. I know he missed the bus..and now I am frantically putting my pants on, a sweater and trying to locate my flip flops (it 40 degrees out today). Cedar bucket is still snoozing but I pull a sweater over her head anyway. This is what she says with crazy madusa morning-hair and half awakedness: Okay. Oh hi mom. Hi. I'm awake now. Where going? Oh. Okay. Hi Clancey.
In the car:
This freaking sucks! I hate school so much. Every single day. School. School. School.
And I'm so hungry. I'm not going to get to eat! Man. I hate this. This is stupid.
K, bud. You'll be fine. Just keep an open mind.
No. No. This is so stupid. I freakin hate school!
at the drop off now, ready to head in to the stupid school:
You know what?! I'm going to make everyone have a bad day. This is freakin dumb. I'm going to make everyone have a sucky day too. Like THAT kid! That kid right there! He's a crap kid.
Don't do that. Just start over. It was just a bad morning. Have a good day! Could you pick up that tissue that fell out of the car?
as he's picking up tissue:
Freakin.
Bye.
Bye! Love you!
I just thought I'd share, because during the whole escapade I wanted to smile. Not because I thought it silly or un-warranted. But anytime my kids are so intense, it causes me to ponder their uniqueness and ability to live with heart and gusto! (and also, it's just so dang cute when my boy has bed head and is saying things like freakin and crap kid.)
I love you Clancey bud! I hope your day gets better and better! YOU CAN DO IT! BE STRONG!
Maybe I'll let you have a
*the updated part*:
9:00:
phone rings.
Mom, can you come get me for lunch?
Yep. I can. See ya later.
11:20
Cedar..as we're driving to the school:
Clancey! We're coming Clancey! You crying a little bit? Clancey we're coming Clancey! You crying? Coming Clancey! We're coming!
at lunch:
Sorry bout this morning, Mom.
That's okay. We all have moments like that sometimes.
I like how you tried to make me happy and stuff. Thanks.
You're welcome. It happens. It's okay.
TaDA!
(he's wonderful.)
Seriously though....it's moments like this that make me question how truly good the school system is for my children. A lot of this breakdown was because he is so stressed out about grades all the time...trying to keep up so that he can participate in fun activities at the end of each week. When he is "under par" with grades according to the school, they don't get to participate. (AND they have to go to study hall when everyone else is having fun! AND they get points against them! Clancey's had to go to study hall twice. One more and he gets an office referral!..school's only been in session a month and a half!) Struggling. Struggling to stay afloat and to feel good about himself. Worrying constantly. Excitement for school is not there because of all this academic pressure. I don't like it.
I wish I had it in me to homeschool and to instill in my kids a love of learning. Helping kids get motivated about life and education seems to be lost in the system I feel. crap. I want to just scoop em up, get in an RV and go tour the world..learning and growing our minds with experience! That would be better.
footnote:
When I checked Clancey out for lunch, the office lady (very nice bytheway otherwise) said...'if he's one minute late coming back, then he can never get checked out for lunch again.' I said.."even if a parent checks him out and okays it?" Even if. It was 11:25. And he had to be back by 11:50. Nice. Way to fuel the fire school people. Way to fan the flames.
...and p.s.:
I'm not letting on to my kiddos all these views. But if they mention another thing the school says or does to un-encourage my offspring and that make me want to scream, I might say something like "What the
17 comments:
Poor little buddy! I remember those days and that feeling! School does suck, i still hate it even though i dont have school anymore....i love cedars little comments, she is such a sweet little thing, all your kids are...they are so special they are! Not special ed, sometimes, but not that kind :)
Thanks Allyoop! I hated school too. I always felt poopy about myself there. (Except elementary. I loved those days! And reading out loud! Oooh! fun!)
I've got to change my attitude and make it one of gratitude!
That is the saddest and sweetest story. He is such a wonderful boy. I love your kids!
Thanks for commenting, Lor! It makes me sad too. I love them too! And you! And Toto too!
Aw! Little tiger. I love our freakin boys....he seemed fine this afternoon! I wish mine was as easy to snap out of it once in a while. I just need to be nicer like you.
Oh Nicole...you are the nicest woman alive!!! My boys would live with you if they could. You are full of light and love always. We love your boys.
You handled that situation so great. You are right about the schools...they can really make or break a child's attitude about learning.
I had a conversation about a very similar topic just today with a few moms. Utah...Wisconsin...it is all the same. Keep being your child's advocate when it comes to school...you know what's best for them.
I hope that his afternoon improved and he has a great week.
Thank you soooo much, Julie! His mood has already improved. But I'm on guard now. For this reason, my deer eyes are wide open!
Don't get me started...oops to late:
I have zero tollerence for dumb head school authority bullies. Its tricky cause you don't want them to target your kids cause they are mad at you. But you have to let them know you are watching.
You are so lucky to have such a sweet sweet boy. You handled that perfectly.
BTW that is way bull-honkey that you can't check him out for lunch. He is YOUR kid. You have full access. I would have been exactly one minute late and stared that lady down when I brought him back. Sheesh.
Before I put my kids in Franklin, before we moved to (freakin) Yuma I went toe to toe with the Pricipal (Mr. Lineberry)over bathroom dicipline. Some wonky rule about only going to the bathroom so many times in a day. I told him you can't regulate everything esspecially a 6 year olds bladder. They were actually being punisheed for going to the bathroom. He threatened to report me when I let him know I wouldn't send my kids until them matter was settled. I said fine. I am their mother. I will meet their needs and go to bat for them. because you deffinately aren't the guy for the job. Who do I sent THAT report to?
And you are better than I am 'cause I have called that man Mr. Dingleberry ever since in front of the kids. I did make sure to tell them not to say it at school. :)
Hey Susan! Can you send me an invitation to read your blog? I would love to read about your goings ons. And thanks for commenting. It's good to know I'm not the only mama frustrated with stupid school rules and other things of that nature.
Shoot me an email at smcookmom@gmail.com so I can invite you.
Great post Jenny, it made me tear up. We are in the middle of some real stress times for my boys. I want them to love to learn and I want them to find joy around them, but the life does get sucked out of them some days. I HATE the rules that they have on attendance. I am not looking forward to middle school. Both you and Clancy are lucky to have each other. Gail
super-duper post...i love it! NOT that clancey is stressed and had a bad day of course...but just...just...well...it was just so darn cute. the way he says things..and cedar-poo...
i am in TOTAL agreement w/school and all that pure nonsense...such a hard decision when it comes to things like that...
You have incredible kids, incredible insights and I love your story telling prowess! You have been on my mind lately. Once again I am feeling that... "if only we could have a friday night beer (or green tea) together". Why can't you just fax people? Seriously?
I know every school has issues, but like you once told me, even if you're not SAYING how you feel about it, your boys can FEEL how you feel about it. Good luck, talk to someone at the school if you need to. They're not bad people, they're just trying for the most part to do their best. I hope the kids have more good days than bad! Love ya.
What a sweet kid w/ a sweet mom & a stinkin' cute little 2-yr. old!
I love Bodie's kindergarten teacher. Her number one rule is that they have fun -because if they're not having fun, they won't want to learn. Her number 2 rule is that they treat everyone nicely. And then, #3 to learn something. :) It's awesome.
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